Ladies and Gentlemen, listen up.

Every time I hear the term “ladies’ sport” it makes me cringe.  I have always insisted on female athletes being referred to as women, or girls if the athletes in question are aged under 18.  My stance has baffled some people, including the athletes themselves, who think “ladies” is simply a nice and polite way to refer to women.  I feel I need to explain myself, so listen up because this is important.

There are a number of options you can choose when differentiating between genders.  Male and female are neutral terms, and can be applied widely, across age groups, even across species.  Humans, animals, and even plants can be referred to as male and female.  Boys and girls, and men and women, are human terms that are age specific.  The age at which a person can be referred to in the adult form is open to interpretation, but so long as it is consistent across both genders, it doesn’t really matter.  There is no emotion attached to these terms, they are simply a reference to gender and age.

The words ladies and gentlemen are different.  They imply not just gender, but social context, and an expectation of conduct.  When we address people as ladies and gentlemen, we are asking them to adhere to certain social stereotypes of appearance, conduct and demeanour.  We are asking them to be gentle, well-presented, courteous and polite.  So what’s wrong with that?  Nothing at all, of course.  Except that we expect men to behave this this way only sometimes, depending on the situation, whereas we expect women to behave this way all the time.

Which brings me to sport.  Some sports are more gentile than others, but there are very few in which gentlemanly or ladylike conduct would provide a significant competitive advantage.  “Now get out there and behave like a gentleman” said no coach, ever.  That’s why we never refer to “gentleman athletes”.  We expect male athletes to compete in an honourable way and adhere to the rules of the sport, but that is not the same as being a gentleman.  We neither want nor expect men to be gentlemanly on the sportsfield.  Hell no, we want to see passion and guts and glory.  We want to see them strain and grunt and sweat.  We want them to “leave it all out there”.  Anything less would be boring to watch, and frankly disappointing.  Male athletes are men.  They may be gentlemen at home, or at the after-match function, but on the sportsfield, or on the racetrack, they are men.

Why then, do we insist on referring to female athletes as ladies?  The traditional expectations of how a lady should look, behave, and be treated, are of no use at all to an athlete.  Is it too much to ask that women be allowed to cast off those ladylike expectations, and just be athletes?  To strain and grunt and sweat?  To leave it all out there? 

Time and again I hear people (men and women) try to justify the huge disparity in pay rates and career opportunities between male and female athletes by arguing that “ladies” sport is boring.  It is not as aggressive, as exciting, or as competitive as men’s sport.  Yet at the same time we continue to hold women up to ideals that are not conducive to competitive sport.  We want them to be ladylike, then we complain that they are boring to watch.  

I am not trying to argue that women should abandon all effort to behave in a ladylike manner, or that being a lady is a bad thing.  All I’m asking is that while female athletes may be expected to be ladies at home, or at the after-match function, they may be women on the sportsfield, or on the racetrack.  All I’m asking is equality. 

Female athletes may still be a long way from achieving equality in pay rates and career opportunities, but if that gap is ever to be bridged, then achieving equality in our expectations of conduct in sport is an honourable goal.  Sportsmanlike and honourable behaviour in competition?  Yes, definitely.  Ladylike demeanour?  Not so much.  It’s boring, after all.

That’s why, whenever I hear people refer to “lady athletes” or “ladies’ sport” I feel compelled to correct them.  It’s not because I enjoy being a ball-busting bitch.  It’s not because I think that all the people who use these terms are misogynist wankers; on the contrary, they are, for the most part, perfectly lovely people who are just trying to be nice.  I challenge them because I believe that the only way we can improve the prospects for women in sport, and in all walks of life, is to question the way we think and speak about women.   

One word at a time.